Sometimes, whatever it is other people think about you is their bag of rocks to carry. Don’t pick it up just because they wrote your name on it. — Via TomatoNation

This is so, so true!
Everyone deals with criticism on a regular basis; it’s human nature to be judgemental (& some people can be quite rude about it), so it is important to consider which of the following group you fall into: Group A – you heard a negative comment said about you & you can’t stop thinking, Group B – you heard a negative comment about yourself & let it go or Group C – you might have heard something but, don’t know don’t care!
It’s hard to come accross many people in the last group, people who truly have no regard for what people think of them. I think we all care (at least to a certain degree) about what our friends and family think, as well as strangers in some cases. And I’m talking beyond your appearance here. We not only put up with our own inner critic, but people’s opinion of us as well. The difference is, some know how to break away from the negative while others attach themselves to it. The first kind of people fall in Group B, and they are usually confident enough in their sense of self that they can choose to acknowledge and discard negative comments, or sometimes even choose to listen to them in order to see themselves from an objective point of view – has this person seen something I haven’t? Can I do something about it?

I think it’s safe to say that a lot of us fall into Group A, finding it difficult to detach from negative/rude/hurtful comments said about us. But we’re going to start breaking away from that, and here’s how:

We define the self as things or attributes that we associate with ourselves as individuals. Things that make Luana, Luana. Things without which you would not be you. This may include your opinions, mannerisms, style, sometimes even the job you do. It’s different for everyone. And so, the self is not stagnant, but flowing; the attributes that defined your self at ten may not define your self at this point in your life. We are a collection of everything in our universe, and sometimes it takes one comment to rip everything to shreds (or nearly). But it is just something we have to live with – some people will understand and others won’t.

  • Think honestly: if you’ve ever received a negative comment, consider it for a second. (i.e. if the comment was “God look at her hair!” why do you think that was?)
  • Reason through it – was the comment (although rude) true? Is my hair a mess, did I forget to brush it today or is something stuck to it? Some people can be very rude to openly criticize others like that, but their comment might have a reason.
  • If there was no reason for that comment, discard it. Your hair is fine. If there was, fix it! In a way that rude person has helped you by avoiding a similar situation in the future.
  • What defines your self?
  • Cross out the things you aren’t proud of and add things you would like to define you.
  • Learn to love your little quirks, your laugh, your voice. Compliment yourself & mean it! Learn to appreciate all the good in your self.

Confidence is key, but it doesn’t come overnight. It comes from loving your self, or at least working on it so that you come to love everything that defines you. If you love yourself it will show through. To me, there is nothing more beautiful than confidence, and although people will continue to put down those bags heavy with negativity, you now know they’re not for you to pick up!